33

Age 33 also known as the “Jesus year”. 33 is the age Yeshua was when he started his spiritual and political revolution. Some psychologists have asserted that our “Jesus year” tends to be the happiest time of our lives.

“By this age innocence has been lost, but our sense of reality is mixed with a strong sense of hope, a can-do spirit and a healthy belief in our own talents and abilities”. 

It is also the year that universal energies can propel you to the next level and your greatest heights or that you crash if you haven’t been doing the inner work. It is usually around this age that people deal with a ‘mid-life‘ crisis. If you’ve been working consciously towards your self-growth and development,  working on balancing your “inner geometry” then It tends to be a year of great success. However, there are a lot of people who don’t actually make it their 33rd year so I’m grateful to be experiencing this moment at all. I took a while to write this blog post because I hadn’t blogged in a while. But I’ve been writing. Regularly. This year I started writing four books. A short ebook with tips for writers, a children’s book, a non-fiction book, and a fiction book. I really pushed the boundaries with different styles of writing and embraced myself as a writer. But I didn’t blog as much. I guess I was saving a lot of it for my books. However my birthday posts have become something of a tradition for me,  for the past 5 years, I’ve shared my birthday reflections with you all. I couldn’t let today be any different. Especially as it is such a significant year. I honestly thought about writing this for the past few weeks but I would always put it off, I really didn’t know what to say or where to start. So I decided to follow the advice I give to my clients and aspiring writers alike. Just do it. Just put pen to paper, or fingers to keypad, whichever you prefer, and let it all flow out. Write exactly what you’re thinking about at the time. Even if it’s “I don’t know what to write”. Lol. So here I am. 

I mean, the past year woooo, it has been phenomenal. I can actually say I am living my dream. 2021 was the year I saw my manifestations come to fruition in the most vivid ways. It was my first year back living in the land that I adore. With the beach on my doorstep, fresh fruits and vegetables, beautiful melanated people, and a constant supply of healing sunshine. It truly has been my dream. Not to say I didn’t have down moments, where I cried, felt frustrated, stressed, exhausted. But amidst all of that, I had inner peace just balancing and looking at me. Saying, ‘you go mama, you got this’.

I lived intentionally and consciously. The most self-aware year of my life so far. I told myself yes, over and over again. Sometimes I told myself no over and over again. Whatever was intentionally and consciously good for me. I did. Unapologetically. Of course, I still had days when I wasn’t so strong, days where it was harder to stand firm in my spirit. But I tell you what,  I would go inside and speak to my ancestors and they would hold me. They would lift me and they would guide me. Not a day went by that I didn’t acknowledge and speak to them. Spiritually I grew daily. Discovering more and more about Source, connecting deeper to the God energy within me and around me, expanding and evolving my mind and my views, my universe, in ways I didn’t even know were possible. I felt a deeper connection to it all. Old thought patterns fell away, my consciousness expanded. I feel like my soul shined brighter than she has ever done this year. In happiness, in bliss, in sadness, in anger, in stress, in uncertainty. There she was, guiding me, navigating me. Teaching me new ways to live, new ways to think, new ways to experience life, ways that brought me so much peace, so much more understanding, so much more love.

33 and I am in the best shape of my life. Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. I look at myself and I am so proud of myself. Not even about the goals set and smashed, but for my soul. For who I am. For my commitment to myself. For always believing that I fucking deserve the best no matter what anyone else says and always going for what I believe in. For my ability to research and learn and adapt or adjust according to my findings. For my integrity, my diligence, my softness, my fierceness, my passion. For my ability to live with all these different layers of my Being in harmony. Consciously acknowledging all these different aspects of me and knowing when to use each one. Without feeling the need to suppress or oppress any of them.

I must say, it wasn’t all roses- it was constantly reminding myself and retraining my inner voice when she would operate on old redundant thought patterns. Instead of getting angry as I would have done in the past, I would catch myself in the harshness and soften my inner voice. Because I deserve love and care. I deserve to love on me. I deserve to talk to myself like I am a God because I am. God is within me. I am a beautiful manifestation of God. So I deserve to love myself irrespective of how others feel. I deserve to honour my soul.

One thing I struggled a lot with was my style of speaking. I started two amazing podcasts this year (The Power of women and Feminine Expressions << click the hyperlink to listen), so I guess I was a lot more conscious of my tone. I have a lot of power in my voice. When I’m passionate, angry, heated, or even excited it comes across as strong, powerful, loud, even hurried at times. I always hated it. Growing up I was constantly told to tone down my voice, tone down the fire. It was always a problem. I would be shown other women who spoke quietly and calmly at all times.  So I eventually grew to despise this part of me. I wanted to be my best self and this part of me didn’t fit in with my vision of what my highest self was like. My best self was always calm, calculated, and poised. Always soft-spoken. Or so I thought. But a few weeks ago, after another internal cringe session at the way, my voice came across whilst making a point I was passionate about; I realised that I did not deserve that. I did not deserve to cringe at myself. Why treat myself like that? Programming. That’s why. But I decided it would stop with me. I would break the chains. I was picking up energy that did not belong to me. The energy of those who weren’t comfortable with themselves so were always cringing at themselves and others. There were also those who had the ability to see me differently and would tell me,  I love your voice Teso, it is so beautiful and it makes you who you are.  Yet I barely paid those any mind and instead focused on those who said that I was “too much” not feminine enough, those who made me believe that I had to stifle myself to walk as my highest self.

 I realised that trying to adhere to this ideal version of my best self was doing more harm than good. I was trying to suppress this powerful side of me and that was not me being my higher self at all. On the contrary. It was me continuing the cycle of unacceptance of self. Trying to fit into a box that my soul couldn’t stand. I am a powerful Being.  A multi-faceted enigma that cannot be boxed. My energy is one of a kind. My ability to be all of these different things and have them run in harmony,  is me operating as my highest self. I love my strong powerful voice, I love my soft gentle voice. I love my presence. I love the way I reason.  I love every nook and cranny of my Being. I have broken deep-rooted toxic societal thought patterns and generational curses.  And in doing so freed my ancestors before me and those to come after me. I will continue to do the work to free my soul and free the collective consciousness because life is to be lived freely. We were born free.

To live intentionally and consciously is to pay attention to your thoughts, your feelings, your ideas, your views, and the things that shape them. It is to be mindful- which is to be fully present in every moment. It is to be conscious of the things you consume with your senses and the effect it has on you. It is to be self-aware and truly get to know yourself. To harmonise your mind, body, and soul. To start living for yourself and allowing others to live for themselves. To live free and allow others to live freely. To always give the respect, courtesy, and love you seek, first to yourself, and everything else will follow.

Here’s to year 33, a year of great abundance, spiritual propulsion, fulfilled prophecy, and purpose.

Happy Solar Return to me, Teso the Starseed.  

If you don’t already have a copy of my book “Her Rantings: a 21st-century woman’s voyage of enlightenment”, I would love nothing more for my birthday than for you to purchase a copy. They are available to buy >>> here <<<< just click the hyperlink.

If you’ve already gotten your copy and would like to bless me with a birthday gift, I’m accepting cash gifts via Paypal and my bank account.

Paypal – tesoluwaibi@gmail.com

Gtbank Naira – 0108832511

Gtbank Dollar – 0167900514

Thank you so much for all your support throughout the years. I love you guys.